Friday, January 24, 2014
Narrowing the gap
You know what to do, you may know how to do it, yet still you don’t do it.
This is not a post about how to keep your new year’s resolutions. I don’t care for them. I hope you set goals any day of the year. I suggest you work to grow and achieve regardless the date on the calendar.
This is merely a post with some questions. Questions that can help you narrow the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Are these all the questions you need? No. Are they relevant and useful? My clients say they are.
0. Do you know the ‘why’ and ‘whereto’ of the goals you have set?
1. How realistic are your expectations of yourself and of your objectives considering the resources you have available / are willing to allocate?
2. How much time and energy do you really spend on those things you call important?
3. How strong are your observation, reflection, and here-and-now awareness skills?
4. What’s truly blocking you? What needs and fears are holding you back?
5. Do people tell you what they really think? Do you invite them to? Do you actually listen to them?
6. Are you courageous enough to defy self-deception, excuse-thinking, and other victim behaviors? How do you know you are?
7. How do you manage the tension between persisting versus adjusting?
8. Do you actually live the principle: You always have a choice and that choice has consequences?
9. It’s such an easy statement to make, but do you truly hold yourself accountable and do you invite others to hold you accountable?
I call the first question the zero question because if you don’t ask and answer this question, nothing else really matters.
If you hoped for a magic formula, I am happy to disappoint you. It doesn’t do individual differences and specific circumstances any service to pretend that there is one solid success method to turn ‘knowing’ into ‘doing’. The best thing I can do is ask you a couple of questions to get you thinking. Hopefully they get you thinking a little differently.
One of the many good resources related to this topic:
“The Power of Habit – Why we do what we do” by Charles Duhigg