What you think. How you think.

Why would I reinvent and rewrite what others have already produced? Below you find some of the many thoughts of Philip E. Tetlock as discussed in his book “Expert Political Judgment – How good is it? How can we know?” (2005, Princeton University Press)

Tetlock is a professor of leadership at the University of California, Berkeley who poses interesting questions such as:

- Do you accept ambiguity and contradiction as inevitable features of life?

- Do you update your beliefs in response to evidence?

- Do you realize it’s very human to engage in self-serving reasoning?

- Do you know when you've become a prisoner of your pre-conceptions?
- Do you focus on Who got what right or on Who changed their mind when they were wrong?

There is so much more to ask and there is so much more to say about our thinking but I’ll stick with the following: You are likely reluctant to acknowledge that you were wrong and you are probably reluctant to change your mind. Both can be very damaging, in the workplace and in your private life. Tetlock references laboratory experiments on belief perseverance (the tendency to cling to your initial belief even after receiving new information that contradicts or dis-confirms the basis of that belief) that show us that we use cognitive strategies to justify holding firm in order to diffuse threats to our (professional) self-esteem. Add to this our collective preference for simplicity and our aversion to ambiguity and dissonance and you can see how our thinking can become pretty messy and biased.

So my question to you is: What is it that you do to de-bias your thinking? It’s not just about what you think - what matters at least as much is how you think.

Reflections on Accountability

In my 28-year career in leadership and team coaching I have enjoyed and struggled with supporting organizations in implementing accountability practices. The struggle is partly rooted in the power of fears for consequences, in the power of mistaken beliefs, and in the power of ingrained practices that are harming accountability more than they are helping. I presented on this topic at the Minnesota Project Management Institute, the Rochester Community Technical College, the Southern Minnesota APICS chapter, the University of Minnesota, the Minnesota Continuing Legal Education, Hennepin County, and many more organizations and associations from which I’d like to share some of my reflections on accountability. I trust they will help you think critically about what accountability is and is not, reflect on how to act accountably, and decide how to best hold others accountable in a way that aids personal learning and company-wide improvement.

Here are some of my reflections on accountability:

Talk is meaningless chatter when no one is held accountable.

Rationalizing and justifying are human tendencies resulting from the need for self-protection. They stand in the way of acting accountable.

Ticking off a box with procedures and saying “I’m sorry” do not constitute examples of acting accountable.

When people are afraid to speak because they anticipate punishment, there is no limit to the risks and problems they are unwilling to disclose.

Vague expectations and unclear boundaries of responsibility and authority make it impossible to hold people accountable.

Attitudes such as Wait and See, Tell me what to do, It’s not my job, and Cover Your Tail are crippling in your quest to increase accountability.

Punishment and blame teach employees that they better not take risks, they better not make mistakes, and more so: better don’t get caught and cover your …

The future is uncertain and you can't change the past. You can however learn from past experiences if, and only if, blame and punishment make room for detailed reviews and true learning.

Many organizations and their people suffer from a habit of victimization resulting from a belief that circumstances and other people prevent them from achieving their goals.

Blame and fault-finding slam the door in the face of a culture and practice of accountability.

Characters such as the gossiper, the sugar coater, the cover-up artist, the quitter, the blamer, and the sand-bagger all hamper accountability (Greg Bustin in his 2014 book on accountability.)

If all you measure, monitor, and reward are results, your staff will be tempted to bend the rules and to avoid accountability for mistakes and failure.

You can do yourself and your company a huge service by stepping outside of your safety tent and challenging yourself and others on any lack of accountability.

Trusting that some of these reflections are meaningful for your specific context I’d like to close with a quote from American writer and futurist Alvin Toffler:

“The illiterate of the future are not those who cannot read or write.

They are those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.”

Easy, Quick Exercises to Increase Awareness & Focus

Buddhist monks and the like excluded, we all have difficulty being fully aware and present in the moment. Many of us suck at focusing on what’s going on here and now whenever it requires us  longer than 60 seconds. 

We have a hard time fully staying with all our focus and attention with the conversation at hand, because we are distracted by worries and excitements about past or future events and by in-the-moment distractions through our smart devices, bodily sensations, or any of our numerous thoughts. If you wish to change this, practice these six easy and quick exercises. It will improve your awareness, strengthen your focus, and help keep your attention fixed in the present moment. 

1. One minute check-in

Sit or stand somewhere comfortably and focus your attention completely on the physical sensation of your body, whether it is the feeling of your buttocks on a soft surface or your feet standing on the floor. Focus on nothing else than your buttocks or feet. Focus your attention on their warmth, the pressure exerted, or the tension in your muscles. Notice how this body part feels. Don’t judge or explain it, just notice.

2. 45 Seconds of conscious observation

Choose an object in your proximity such as a cup, pen, bag etc. yet not your phone. Set a timer for 45 seconds (here your phone is useful) and hold the object in your hands, turn it around as you please. Take in the object with all your senses for 45 seconds. Fully absorb the object. Look at colors, shape, and size and feel the material. Make sure not to study your object intellectually – just observe it for what it is to experience a heightened 'being in the now’.  

3. Count down

Close your eyes and focus your complete attention on slowly counting down from ten. If your concentration wanders off, you simply start back at number 10 without judging or condemning the fact that you're starting all over. Most people have to re-start multiple times, that’s okay. It may go like this: “Ten, nine - When's the deadline for my proposal? Whoops, I’m thinking, not counting. “Ten, nine, eight, seven, six … “ Who is Tim talking to on the phone, he seems upset? Oh dear, I’m not focused on my counting. Lets start again! …

4. One sense only

When you're brushing your teeth in the morning or eating lunch at work, decide to focus on one sense and one sense only. For example: focus on just the smell of the toothpaste for the duration of the brushing. Or focus on the texture of the food, just the texture and nothing else. Notice how it feels in your mouth and on your teeth.

5. Focus through repetition

Choose an inspiring phrase and repeat it silently in your mind for 90 seconds. When you notice another word or sentence entering your mind, start again and repeat until you reach 90 seconds of uninterrupted repetition of your phrase. A few examples:

- I appreciate the things I'm inclined to take for granted.

- I will do others a favor by delaying judgment.

- I'll muster the courage to unmask those reassuring lies we love to tell ourselves.

6. Unexpected guest

When someone comes to your desk or into your office unexpectedly:

- Stop what you are doing, turn your body to face the person, make eye contact, and focus completely on the person.

- Instead of labeling it as an interruption, see what happens if you smile, welcome, breathe, and listen.

- Whether you decide to meet with the person right there and then or not, make sure to leave the interaction with a genuine feeling of focused contact.

As you practice these six exercises daily, don’t judge or condemn diversions and distractions. Whatever grabs your attention, whether it comes from outside (people laughing, a car engine, or the coffee machine) or whether it comes from within (rumbling stomach, fatigue, or thoughts about the 3pm meeting), I ask you to accept the distraction as a fact right here and now, and then push it aside gently for a later time to pay attention to. Nonjudgmentally release any thoughts of the past or the future. Slow down, re-focus completely on your exercise, and remember: Constant practice is the key to success.

Want to get better at handling tough conversations?

Early January I had the honor and pleasure to be back at the webcast studio of Minnesota Continuing Legal Education in downtown Minneapolis. This time I was asked to speak about "The How of Tough Conversations". 

I will share seven elements of this presentation that should strengthen your confidence, insight, and skill in handling a variety of tough conversations. Regardless of the exact nature of your conversation or circumstances, many tough conversations are unpredictable, emotional, and draining. Therefore:  

1. Schedule your conversation early in the day, if you have any control over the timing, to feel as fresh, sharp, and positive as you can. Since we all have a limited amount of mental energy (and thus limited self-control) make sure not to have to exert unnecessary self-control on things that you can do after your conversation or that don't need to be addressed at all! You want to keep sufficient reserves of mental energy for your difficult conversation. 

2. Prepare yourself physically:

- Deep breathing: 6 of them (about 55 seconds!) will already slow down your heart rate and provide your body with the necessary oxygen, including your brain and it's amygdalae (your fear center, involved in processing emotional memory and responding to stressful situations) and your prefrontal cortex (responsible for decision making, personality expression, and moderating social behavior).

- Power posing: a great source to learn about the positive effects of power posing is a TED talk by social psychologist Amy Cuddy, but in brief, if you perform power poses your dominance hormone testosterone goes up and your stress hormone cortisol goes down.

3. Reflect on your fears, needs, assumptions, and thinking flaws that may be at play in this situation. For example: you fear that you won’t be able to contain your frustration, you may be driven by the need to always appear in control, your assumption about the person could be that she’s driven by a wish to outsmart you and your most prominent thinking flaws are drawing premature conclusions and taking things too personal. A great resource on examining and correcting assumptions and thinking distortions is “How to Keep People from Pushing your Buttons” by one of my 'mentors' Albert Ellis. 

4. Know your expectations and make sure they are realistic. Check your partner’s expectations and how he perceives yours. Only if you ask questions about expectations and goals is it possible to align. 

5. Increase your awareness during the conversation: what do you sense in your body (tensing of shoulder muscles?) and which emotions are developing (anxiety)? Emotions provide valuable information to evaluate and guide your thinking and acting. Also use heightened awareness to understand what your conversation partner may be experiencing in the here-and-now. However check your assumptions about the person and delay your judgments – you’ll do yourself and the relationship a great favor.

6. Ask more and better questions. Not questions to prove your point, but questions to understand the person better. Then listen and observe attentively. Remember, most of us are lousy listeners because we allow our own needs, fears and thinking flaws to dominate and we too easily give free reign to internal and external distractions. Hence the importance of awareness in the here-and-now. 

7. Distinguish between the content of a conversation and the relationship or process aspects of that conversation. A great article on this topic is:  https://hbr.org/2016/01/defusing-an-emotionally-charged-conversation-with-a-colleague

Practice makes progress, so use these tips in your next tough conversation!